You should see the Project Startup and pass through database update. As for the error message, please make sure that the database has not been attached to any SQL instances, and no other application is using it. Grant server/user account and ASPNET/NETWORK AUTHORITY full permission over the App_Data folder. It is possible that asp account has only read permissions.
Additionally you could try attaching your Sitefinity database to SQL server using SQL Server Management Studio.
Let us know if there is anything else that we can do for you.
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